Silence

Ketika sang arjuna menjatuhkan panahnya
Tak ada insan yang mampu menghindarinya
Hati terbutakan oleh rindu yang menganga
Seakan dialah insan yang paling merana

Kita hanya mampu terdiam dan menatap
Membisikkan seribu satu bahasa tanpa suara
Seakan bercengkrama dalam dunia kita,
dunia fatamorgana

Kita hanya bisa menatap dalam diam
Seakan-akan mengerti akan isi hati setiap insan

Semua manusia bisa berpaling dan mengepakkan sayapnya
Tapi dia, hanya dia, tetap disana
Menatapku dalam diam

Ketika rindu mulai menguak
Seolah terbutakan oleh sesaknya perasaan
Dan dia masih bertahan disana
Menatapku dalam diam

Karena dalam satu tatapan, terdapat sejuta rindu yang menunggu untuk diungkapkan

Another Apology

I love you

I love you to the extent I couldn’t even tell anyone how much or how deep my love for you

I love you the most. After all this time, I never felt sick or even bored with you. I realise that my feelings for you just got deeper day by day. And no one could tell me how could this happen

I love you

I love you to the extent that I love my korean-idol because he looks so similar with you. Even my self always try to deny it. Yeah, you looks like him. That’s why I love my korean-idol.

I can’t tell my self, how could I supposed to cheer you up? To make you happy just as you always do to me. Because whenever I try, I just end up depressing you and make everything get worse

I’m sorry, I’m lacking so much

I can’t be anyone who could cheer you up and make everything easier.

I’m just your silly girlfriend who loves you so deep and always want to make you happier with me even in fact I only end up hurting you.

I know you can do everything well. Because you’re the best. And my heart is never wrong to judge person.

You’ll be a great person someday. I know. You were born on a very lovely family and great parents. So I know, someday you’ll as great as they are or ever greater than them

So baby, cheer up!!
This is just a beginning. You have to be wiser and tougher. Everything is gonna be alright. I'll be right here beside you whatever and whenever
At the very last, I wanna tell you words that you might be sick to hear of, but it always come from the deepest of my heart,

"I love you"

21:41

Your Silly GF

Nearly 20th

I can't believe I'll turn to 20th soon. This year. So many big things happen on my way to face the precious 20. Banyak kejadian yg bukan hanya menguji mental dan fisikku. Tetapi, menguji kedewasaan dan kedekatanku dengan-Nya. Perjalanan menjelang berkepala 2 memang teramat sangat berat. But yeah, this is just a beginning. Akan semakin banyak hal-hal menakjubkan yg nyaris saja membutakan mata, hati, dan pikiran menanti. Not only me, but my friends on the same age are struggling too. Banyak orang yg bilang, bahwa umur 20 adalah titik balik kehidupan. Umur dimana kita harus mulai berpikiran untuk masa depan yg lebih panjang. Umur disaat satu per-satu orang kesayang kita mulai meninggalkan kita dan memaksa kita untuk hidup mandiri. Sendiri.

So many big things happen last year. I really mean it: so many. Big things. Happen. I thought I wouldn't survive at first. That was just too much for me. I can't believe that the blood relationship means nothing if you can't appreciate it well. Hubungan darah bukanlah menjadi jaminan bahwa ke depannya tidak akan ada batu sandungan yg besar yg nyaris mengaburkan hubungan tersebut. Ya, terlalu banyak hal terjadi yg membuatku paham, semakin hari, kedewasaan memegang peran penting dalam me-manage kepribadian kita.

So......am I qualified enough to become a 20 years woman? Even tough I definitely prefer being on my teen age, I have to face it. Face my 20 age. Banyak orang yg bilang, "Live while we're young" tapi aku tidak. I'll live happily and wisely even on my mid-20th, mid-50th, or maybe on my mid-70th.

Life's short. So take a chance to make a new decisions. Have courage and confident to face all the risks that will block your path. Cheers!